engineering jokes

 Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?" The 
second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman 
rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want." 
The second engineer nodded approvingly,"Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit."
 A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were 
waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer 
fumed, "What's with these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!" 
The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such ineptitude!  
"The pastor said, "Hey, here comes the greens keeper. Let's have a word with 
him." [dramatic pause] "Hi George. Say, what's with that group ahead of us? 
They're rather slow, aren't they?" The greens keeper replied, "Oh, yes, 
that's a group of blind firefighters. They lost their sight saving our 
clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free 
anytime." The group was silent for a moment. The pastor said, "That's so 
sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight." The doctor said, 
"Good idea. And I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if 
there's anything he can do for them." The engineer said, "Why can't these 
guys play at night?"
An architect, an artist and an engineer 
were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a 
mistress. The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid 
foundation for an enduring relationship. The artist said he enjoyed time 
with his mistress, because of the passion and mystery he found there.  The 
engineer said, "I like both."  "Both?" Engineer: "Yeah. If you have a wife 
and a mistress, they will each assume you are spending time with the other 
woman, and you can go to the lab and get some work done."

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